You saw her
somehow,
and I’m not sure why.
A slip of a pronoun
and she’s brought to the front
aware and open,
there’s no hiding it now.
This stomach clenching love disarms me
throws me off guard,
frightens.
You make me want to rock
to cry,
scream,
throw up
I don’t know how to handle you here.
How did you see her
why did you ask?
This room scares me
with it’s big open spaces and grey corners,
how did you get in here?
Little s, big S,
there’s so much more.
These secrets are hers, she’ll tell if she wants,
but right now I am unsure.
How did you know to ask
how could you get past these defenses?
This stomach clenching love scares me
throws me off balance,
topples.
These queries send me running
to a safety,
a hiding place,
a song.
I need its comfort to handle you here.
How did you see her
why did you ask?
This room is so big
with its wide open spaces,
how?
how?
how did you get in here??
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